Suge Knight and his Ford Raptor (courtesy worldstarhiphop.com)

“Did y’all cover this yet?” Mr emails TTAG central command re: Suge Knight’s arrest for a hit-and-run fatality involving his Ford Raptor. “Three things spring to mind:
1) Is this a gun control success story? I mean, it’s not a ‘gun crime’ so I can feel safe, right?
2) Why does anyone ‘need’ anything more than a base F150? You know, the kind of truck ol’ Grandpa took hunting?
3) Do TTAGs’ readers have a modest proposal of ‘bad features’ that CA lawmakers can use to define (and ban) an ‘assault truck’?”

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80 COMMENTS

    • I was fairly certain Feinstein and De Leon were some sort of supervillain duo out of the DC universe.

      Sadly, I woke up from that dream and remembered they actually exist and are *still in office* in CA.

  2. There is simply no need for a “hood thing, that goes up”.
    Or a high capacity gas tank.
    Or an engine that sucks 30 gallons of gas per second.

    • At full throttle, the Dodge Hellcat will empty the tank in 15 min.

      For those who feel the need…

      The need for speed…

    • “Or an engine that sucks 30 gallons of gas per second.”

      Hey, You leave my Hemi out of this! It’s never hurt anybody!

      • But it is scary! It’s very loud, and overwhelmingly powerful, and you probably don’t have the professional training needed to use it properly.

      • Sorry guys, but I don’t know where you are getting your “facts” from!?!?!? It is actually a 30-calibergallonmagazineclipassaulttankthingy that this thing will empty in ½-second, not 1 second! And I don’t know why ANYONE would need “accessories” such as exhaust tips?????? We all know they are much more gooder, I mean deadlier. I mean they only serve one purpose . . . 😛

        • We must ban Headers! And low restriction exhaust systems….

          That’s already a felony in Cali, I hear…

    • None of this is a joke in CA. Im currently going through getting my car to pass smog in a way that doesnt choke the horsepower out of my poor Ford. Sometimes it just takes a couple of Benjamins on the side…

  4. Seems like the pop-ups on his android irritated the puff-up on his hemorrhoid, so he was trying to jump out of a perfectly good truck, and that’s what led to all of this.

  7. A guy who got rich from glorified hood rats turns out to be a bad person? This is my shocked face. No, really…

    • Are you stupid? Do you know what the word hood rat mean? Lol don’t be an idiot using words you have no clue of. A hood rat is a promiscuous girl, stupid. He’s a producer who signed Tupac, one of the greatest rapper of all time. Say what you want about Tupac but you in a million years wouldn’t even amount to his short life. He made great music with meaningful lyrics, or course some weren’t, but he was a hip hop poet who did good deeds but the news will never report. He would visit hospitals when on tour, meeting kids who are terminally ill. So before you open up your trap and spew out bigotry bullshit, I suggest you learn a thing or two about him. I highly doubt anyone can say anything bad about Tupac if they heard his music, I can’t say the same for Suge.

      A hood rat is an often poor woman who engages in sexual activity like a prostitute , but without charge and without being coerced (compare slut).

      • Actually, a “hood rat” is a woman who trolls for men to offer up things, money, drugs, alcohol, good credit, hair weaves, and in return, gives sex, often without serious strings attached or reciprocity. Oftentimes, she is aware she is on the “down low” and is playing second fiddle (or in your summer league) to your #1 Boo or wifey, but does so willingly for the aforementioned “things” (or her bills paid, entre into the clubs, or even a meal at a high-end “restaurant” such as Red Lobster. Sometimes, said hood rat conspires to be #1 and get your main Boo out the picture by showing up uninvited to or calling your home.

        In the suburbs, think mistress or paramour or woman who looks for rich lonely men in crappy marriages hoping to spur a divorce (by withholding sexual favors) until you leave wife #1. Think of the background story of the leader of MDA and how she stole a rich health insurance executive and as Paul Harvey would say, “and there is the rest of the story”.

      • Maybe, but he blew it with his convictions for assualt and sexual assault. With his training in the arts while growing up, I believe he could have actually attained more, but the rapper lifestyle never ends well.

      • “I highly doubt anyone can say anything bad about Tupac if they heard his music…”

        “Grab your Glocks when you see 2Pac,
        Call the cops when you see 2Pac!
        Who shot me? But you punks didn’t finish,
        Now you’re about to feel the wrath of a menace.”

        ???

        His real name was “Lesane Crooks” – the name Tupac Amaru was that of the last Sapa Inca who was executed/assassinated by the Spanish, he was a convicted rapist, and was about to go back to prison for parole violation when he was killed in a gang related shooting / faked his death and fled to the Carribean with the help of ‘the Mafia’ (/CIA, who he was an covert agent for).

    • Only if they’re spinners. Those things chop off kids fingers all the time! 40% of all children have lost fingers to large caliber high velocity spinners!!!!! No one needs such dangerous things just to satisfy their vanity!!!11!!!!!11

  9. Really, the speed limit on I-5 is 70, so there’s no need for a vehicle that can go faster than that. And there’s really no need for a truck like that in the city, he would be fine with a Prius. Preferably a pre-ban Prius with the grandfathered HOV stickers.

  10. Ban cars and trucks with the following features:
    1) Black paint.
    2) Bright colored paint.
    3) Spoilers.
    4) Air dams.
    5) Coupes.
    6) Carbon fiber anything.
    7) Gas tanks in excess of 10 gallons.
    8) Turbochargers and/or superchargers.
    9) Anything with more than 4 cylinders.
    10) Anything with more than 100 horsepower…at the crank.
    11) Anything capable of going faster than 85 MPH.

    Did I miss anything?

    • Yeah, you did. 85 MPH seems “excessive . . .” You sir DON’T seem to care about the children!

    • A few more.
      1.) Southern states require FWD only
      2.) No RWD in any state, without a RWD tax stamp. Your state may completely ban RWD.
      3.) Northern states may require 4WD or AWD
      4.) When moving between states it is on the vehicle owner to make sure their vehicle meets local requirements
      5.) Drivers licences will not be universally accepted. Please check to see what states your license is legal in.

    • You forgot dangerous military features such as adjustable seats (the adjustable stock of the car world) as well as floor mounted shifters (the pistol grip of the car world) as well as transmissions with more than 6 gears (to include neutral and reverse), no one needs high capacity transmissions.

  12. I think we should begin looking right away at the colors of these nefarious machines of death; they only have one purpose, ya know. Death. Did you know 50,000 people a year are killed in this country every year by these engines of horror? How many more must die?

    So immediately we notice the color red; similarly the colors orange, purple, metal flake in whatever color, etc., give us a pretty good indication that the owner-operator has bad intentions.

    Also engine noise. Has the owner-operator modified his tactical vehicle with engine noise accessories and adjustments? This is like unto modifying the sear on an AR to fire full-automatic, like a MACHINE GUN.

    Another bad feature worthy of our attention are smoked glass and one-way glass; clearly a further invitation to gratuitous mayhem.

  13. Is that an evil “racecar style” feature I see on the hood of that truck? And it’s a sporty color too. That’s two racecar features, it is a racecar. A vehicle that looks like that was only made for one purpose, to go faster than the speed limit. It belongs on a track, not on the streets. BAN IT. But make an exception for police. Even though they have much less training with that equipment than even a casual racing hobbyist. And don’t let kids play with toy versions of it. Or draw pictures of it in school.

  14. See, why does anyone need a truck with that much hauling capacity? What are you hauling? The only time someone needs that kind of capacity is when they’re building something big, and only the government has the people with the training/experience needed to handle vehicles that big.

  15. wat he doin drivin he truck in church?
    Mass Murder, obviously occured in church. did the priest or alter boy get hert?
    or NUN of the above

  17. Looks fully-automatic. And seems to have an exhaust silencer too. Must be one of those terrorist car-nuts.

    • Yes, ban fully-automatic transmissions. If you want to be able to drive a car, you need to learn a manual transmission, the way the creators envisioned. No technological advancement allowed.

    • Ah yes, those insidious exhaust silencers need to go. If people could hear the truck coming, they may not have been killed.

      Once those are banned, I will complain about the loud noise they make when driving down the street and will demand that the city ban the operation of unsilenced trucks within city limits. Problem solved.

  19. Raptor sounds scary to me. Maybe if they changed the name to Barney-Truck it would be so dangerous and threatening.

  20. They are not going to understand this comparison – because guns are “evil” and trucks are not.

  22. Worst (or maybe best, who knows) of all is the deceased was apparently Suges’ BFF. So negligent acceleration (in reverse), ignoring every rule about minding the road, fighting with (supposed) security guards, and now his friend is dead all because he wanted to be in a movie. It’s what the people in his records call “thug life.”

  23. We need … like … smart cars or whatever … that will like … not go if you say a bad word or are angry … or whatever.

  24. I’m still amazed that Suge has been out on the streets this long. He has somehow managed to dodge CA’s three strikes law.

  26. Don’t forget. There’s absolutely no need for all terrain tires on that thing. Well not without proper licences which can only be obtained for certain reasons. With the burden of proof being put on the truck owner. Just think…..It’s for the children!!

  27. Clearly, the truck just went into reverse on its own.

    Also clearly, since he is famous and rich, he must be not guilty.

  32. Big E. Smalls, and Notorious BIG, are bof askin wherz da Cadilliac. Seems dey ain’ts representin propa.
    Gotz to be whitey jus kepin a brotha down.
    Gets me Brotha Holder on speeds dial, and calls Sharpton. Bit&@ Pleeeze!

  33. Preach it! This whole ordeal demonstrates why, contrary to what the NewYorker said, we don’t need gun control, or car/truck control. If it were possible to get brain cancer from an illogical news article, millions of people would be dead because the cancer would be so aggressive.

    Sick of the anti-gunner bull.

  34. I hope our next president is so strongly pro-gun that he walks around with a Serpa (or equivalent) holster with a Dirty Harry .44 mag revolver on one hip and an AR-15 slung over his back.

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