drop-safe

In an earlier post, TTAG’s Nick Leghorn raised the alarm on Facebook’s and Google’s decision to censor “fake news.” Nick didn’t mention the role of satire in the fake news biz. ‘Cause there are plenty of sites that troll and droll for laughs. Sites like theonion.com (“America’s Finest News Source”) and clickhole.com, which offers a smart gun spoof entitled The Future Of Gun Safety? This Company Developed A Gun That Is Too Slippery To Hold.

The regularity of gun-related deaths in America is alarming, and so far, Congress has not stepped up to the plate to do anything about it. But one company might just have the answer we’ve all been looking for: A Houston-based startup called Elais Dynamics is poised to change the world of gun safety forever by developing a gun that is too slippery to hold.

The 9mm handgun, which is still in development, features a 10-round magazine, three-dot glow sights, and a continuously lubricated grip that is pretty much impossible to get a firm grasp on. With the political bickering in Washington stymying meaningful gun reform, a weapon that would slip and slide out of a would-be killer’s hands well before they could go on a mass shooting rampage could be exactly the kind of innovative product we need to stem the tide of gun violence.

“This is an extremely slippery weapon—far more slippery than a traditional firearm,” said Elais Dynamics CEO Chuck Leonconi during a safety demonstration for the press, during which he bobbled the very slick gun for several seconds before it squirted out of his hands, bounced off a wall, and slid down some steps into the audience. “The small hands of children have an especially difficult time grasping the weapon, but regardless of your age, you’ll have a hard time holding onto this firearm, even if you’re wearing a glove. This gun is far more likely to go skittering across the floor than end up in the hands of a criminal.”

As Nick pointed out, censorship is a slippery slope. Facebook and Google should have the courage of our convictions and leave them kids alone. Or something like that.

20 COMMENTS

  1. Based on my facebook feed, the American people aren’t very good at discerning when something is satire and take it as literal instead.

    • Major news organizations fall for that stuff too. The Duffel Blog has snagged both CNN and MSNBC multiple times. MULTIPLE TIMES!

    • There was a website, Literally Unbelievable dot org, they compiled Onion/Clickhole posts on social media gone wrong. Doesn’t appear they are updating it anymore, but there is still some funny stuff to read there.

  2. Heck folks think The Onion is funny or clever. It is not… oh for anything approaching National Lampoon circa 1972…

      • Stellar rise and consummate fall. But yeah, the greatest cover I’ve seen in almost 50 years of reading magazines.

        Spy was a semi-worthy successor for an even briefer minute.

  3. On a more serious note, I would opine that if an article or video is clearly labeled as farce, humor, satire or sarcasm there should be absolutely no restriction. Warning should precede the presentation.

    Just as in the famous “yelling fire in a crowded theater” example, the First Amendment doesn’t apply to lying, especially if it may endanger the public (or anyone), which could be argued in this case.

  4. “The 9mm handgun, which is still in development, features a 10-round magazine, three-dot glow sights, and a continuously lubricated grip that is pretty much impossible to get a firm grasp on.” So you won’t be able to defend yourself AND the “teens, youth’s, young people, flash mob, whatever” will still be able to beat you to death.
    So there…..

  5. You mean like when the guy who sent me a birthday cake that said “I’m sorry you have AIDS but happy birthday” as written in red icing with a syringe wrote an article about supporting Hillary Clinton to support his bottom line in dealing firearms and everyone on TTAG thought he was serious as a heart attack?

    • In that particular case, one shouldn’t be surprised that a guy who consistently portrays himself as a complete asshole in all his writing has convinced people that he’s actually a complete asshole.

  6. Watchout Facebook and Google…President elect, Mr. Trump is pissed off with the Tass news media agencies of CNN, and MSNBC…I believe with all the slanted leftist propaganda by most of these media outlets…Especially, Facebook, and Google–corporate Left-wing PC…They all should be worried…I would recommend a full GOP congressional committee to do a full review of all these media outlets 1st Amendment Licensing, and press credentials. Full investigation into a lack of journalistic integrity…Outright lies, propaganda, agitprop, spindoctoring, whitewashing, misdirection,etc.(Against Trump, and other US citizens that disagree…) I Also believe all reporters for these agencies should have full public universal background and mental healthcare checks…Transparency of National corporate news media….

  7. Courage of their convictions????

    Facebook was founded because Mark Zuckerberg was an asocial loser in college and couldn’t figure out how to get dates. It never really had an agenda beyond that.

  8. Not sure how you decide what’s “fake news”, but if the “fact check” sites are representative, people have as hard a time distinguishing between “facts”, and

    A saw an article directly quoting Zuck, where he names Breitbart, Vox, and The Huffington Post as sites to “ban.”

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