Screen cap by Boch. Via Twitter.

When Chicago Police — according to their own stats — only solve 5.8% of serious crimes, it can leave victims more inclined to administer some street justice to bad guys doing bad things. Last Saturday, a viral video on Twitter captured what happened when a ne’er-do-well with a knife tried to relieve a motorist of his Kia.

The would-be carjacker produced a knife in an attempt to hijack a ride. And it seems, if as claimed, the car’s owner didn’t find the threat of curbside thoracic surgery amusing and unleashed a smackdown that won’t buff out. How bad was it? Let’s just say the recipient is lucky if he’ll be able to do much more than color with Crayons.

Not only did punches turn into playing soccer with the bad guy’s melon, but it culminated with a “ringing” tribute of skull meeting steel. Twice.

Be advised: Video is not safe for work for language and epic violence.

Louder with Crowder had a very colorful description of the video.

Welcome to Chicago. Home to inferior pizza, AEW’s Brawl Out, and so much crime it makes New York City and Los Angeles look like less of a crime-infested suckhole. With so much crime, it’s understandable why someone would think you can break into someone’s car and get away with it. And this guy almost did. Only the car owner came back too soon and proceeded to throttle the jacker all over the streets of Chicago. SPOILER: It involves a metal support beam.

This is all alleged, according to the woman who thought to take out her phone and do it for the content. The beatdown remains undeniable.

Stealing Kias are a big thing with the kids these days. Of course, the elected officials of these crime-infested cities blame the car companies for their cars being stolen and not the policies creating the crime infesting the cities. It’s all part of some “Steal a Kia” challenge on the communist Chinese-owned social media platform TikTok. The algorithm shows Chinese kids doing cool engineering and science sh*t in China. Americans get how-to videos on stealing cars. Totally by happenstance too, I’m sure.

[…]Unclear is what happened to either man. In a just world, the Kia owner would have left the criminal a crumpled-up mess in the street, gotten in his car, and driven off into the sunset. But this is Chicago. There is more of a chance of authorities rushing to the criminal’s aid while they arrest the victim, asking the failed thief where the bad man hurt him.

Meanwhile, CWB Chicago reports that police say it may not have been an attempted carjacking the spurred the beatdown.

CWB Chicago has learned that the man who got beaten up talked to police and filed a report. His version of events is much different from the internet story. And, in an interesting twist, the men who attacked him — the ones he supposedly tried to take a car away from — didn’t leave the scene in a vehicle. They walked away, according to a CPD officer who saw the footage from a city surveillance camera.

It happened at 10:19 a.m. Saturday on the corner of State and Van Buren.

Witnesses called 911 to report the incident as it happened, and police arrived pretty quickly. They met up with the 24-year-old man whose head had been slammed into the L track beam.

He told them he was walking through the Loop when a man came up to him from behind and struck him with a “hard object,” according to a Chicago police spokesperson. In the video, the object appears to be a sign on a weighted pole.

His backpack fell into the street, and one of the men dragged him by his leg onto the sidewalk. After kicking and punching the man in his face and head, one of the men picked up the man and drove his head into the L track column.

According to a CPD spokesperson, a third person stole the man’s backpack from the street, and the entire group fled the scene just before police arrived. A police camera operator said they headed west on Van Buren and were last seen crossing Clark Street.

The man with the knife was just walking down the street minding his own business. Or so he says. He should be thanking his lucky stars that the (alleged) Kia owner wasn’t armed. The bottom line: Chicago is not safe. And don’t expect any assistance from the local constabulary.

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47 COMMENTS

  1. yeah, a no car involved carjack, right.
    they new him. so very surprised he didn’t spill the beans on his attacker!
    why are (the proverbial) “we” pushing the sensationalized version of this?
    straight talk, boys. we’ll provide the nonsense.

  2. At what point in that beating was the threat actually neutralized?

    NOT saying the perp did not deserve every
    thing he received.

    • It’s the Stinger model but perp’s take anything mainly from distribution centers next to rail yards.

  4. I’m surprised he can remember anything after so many head shots by a fair sized boy. Maybe he forgot about trying to steal the kia due to his injuries. Bet he won’t pull another knife on a grown ass man!

  6. This is exactly why foreign countries have less homicides. In this incident no loss of life happened because there was no gun involved. Strange that these guys did not get in a car to leave so maybe the young man was not lying. Even if he was lying would that have justified executing someone for theft and that damn well would have happened if the other guys had been armed with guns.

    Of course the vicious homicidal Far Right will be screaming that the young man should have been shot and killed on the spot. It begs the question which naked ape was more loathsome.

    Considering how excited the depraved Far Right become when they see an execution one wonders who is more dangerous to society, the thief or the depraved Far Right. The depraved Far Right would bring back chopping off hands and putting out eyes or burning witches at the stake in a nano second if they could get aways with it. It still goes on in some Far Right Middle East States which are no different than the Far Right religious fanatics in Capitalvania.

  9. And a third person stole the man’s backpack from the street. “Damn it! All My crack was in there!” the man exclaimed.

  11. I don’t usually care what Crowder sez but Chiraq has great pizza. Other than that She-ca-go sux…

  12. From about ’87 to 2007 I use to travel to all the major cities in this country and within reason drive or walk anywhere I wanted to go unarmed and without fear. What the hell happened to this country? I wouldnt go to any of those cities now without 2 guns and a posse.

    • Funny thing is, the video is on Instawhore or twitter or whateverthefuck that is lol. But yes, it’s social media in general especially in “western” countries.

    • m. colson: Funny you should ask; I’m here to help.
      Dacian
      From the American Heritage Collage Dictionary:

      Da-ci-a (da’ she-a, -sha.) An ancient region and Roman province corresponding roughly to present-day Romania; abandoned to the Goths after A.D. 270. Da’ci-an adj. & n.

      Note: In the pronunciation guide (above in the parenthesis), the dictionary uses an upside down “e” to represent the sound in she-a and -sha, which I cannot reproduce on my computer. So, I have substituted an “a” in both cases, which comes fairly close. Also, as shown in the dictionary, “Dacian” should be capitalized.

      • “Also, as shown in the dictionary, “Dacian” should be capitalized.”

        Fvck that noise.

        I extend my dis-respects by refusing to capitalize troll names, so ‘dacian’ it shall remain… 🙂

        • Okay Geoff, I hear what you’re saying. BUT the dictionary is talking about the REAL Dacian, not the troll dacian.

    • Because when some cannot afford to travel to and enjoy the welcoming confines of the Windy City “World Hip Hop Star” lets you experience it from the safety of your home.

      I commend the platform ie. World Hip Hop Star and others like it they have spawned a new generation of Jane Goodalls’.

  17. It warms my heart watching a criminal getting nearly beaten to death. And this is how you solve a crime problem, without getting the government involved.

    • I do like how they dragged him out of the middle of the street. So he wouldn’t be run over by any cars. This way, they could beat this armed criminal some more. Without being interrupted.

    • Was he a criminal? The carjacking story appears to be BS that’s solely on the video caption, and there are conflicting reports of whether the guy was or was not trying to break into a car. Hardly conclusive evidence either way as to who was at fault instigating the conflict.

      • At the very beginning of the video the accused criminal is holding a very long weapon of some type. His intended victim simply picked up the closest thing he could get his hands on. A movable street sign that he could use for self-defense. Fortunately he was strong enough to use it to defend himself.

        If this victim was a woman, there is no way she would have been able to pick up this heavy object. And use it as a defensive tool.

        If criminals don’t want to be beaten? Then perhaps they should not try to harm others. This guy simply chose the wrong victim. Who was strong enough to defend himself.

        Most unarmed victims can’t.

  18. There is absolutely no excuse for this level of violence and to GLORIFY it is bloody disgraceful to say the least
    The guy with the knife was as had been disarmed and kicked full bodied in the head half a fozen time helples as a new born babe. Another illustration of the RAGE and FEAR that is America and YOU CRAZIES think you are free? Hemay wellhave been a ‘perp’ but he is still a human being.
    Enough of the make believe Hollywood Western vigilante stuff! For goiods sake show some self control. I’d be betting as well that the guy doing the kicking has a record as long as your arm.

    • I’m glad this terrifies you. Now you can go spread the word and tell potential criminals what will happen to them. If they don’t stop with their criminal activities.

    • Albert L J Hall

      As long as the perpetrator remained conscious and breathing he was a “threat” kind of like the brown rearend-in-the-air Channel crossing invaders infesting your once great kingdom committing “knife” crimes, bombing concert venues, hacking soldiers to death in the street, and organizing rape gangs.

      The Dunblaine Massacre was committed by a Labor Party activist and Jeremy Corbyn supporter in order to advance the UK’s civilian disarmament agenda.

    • Albert L J Hall, So your “solution” is abject surrender? How British of you not to mention STUPID?

  19. The person is holding some object, which may or may not be a weapon. Just carrying a weapon doesn’t identify who initiated the conflict.

    If one carries and contemplates ever intervening in a conflict, one should practice distinguishing between facts that can be reasonably determined from the available data and assumptions which aren’t clearly evident from the available data. No clear evidence here as to who the original aggressor was (unless you join the hoplophobe side in assuming that anyone carrying a weapon must have ill intent).

    • I am not concerned with someone who is walking down the street displaying their holstered sidearm. Or displaying their long gun at sling arms. I am also not concerned when someone I see walking down the street wearing a sheaved knife on their belt.

      But someone who is walking down the street with a firearm in their hands. Or someone walking down the street with a knife or a sword in their hands. I do get very concerned. And I believe that would be very concerning to anyone. And if someone is walking down the street with a baseball bat.
      Or they’re walking down the street with a tire iron. And there is no broken down vehicle near them. I would also find that very concerning.
      And if anyone were to approach me holding these weapons in their hands then I would be very concerned.

      Decades ago a New York City subway train Rider by the name of Bernard Getz, was approached by four young black men holding screwdrivers. I remember laughing at this thinking how silly it was, that this Subway Rider would be afraid of people holding hand tools.
      It wasn’t until years later that I realized that having a knife in New York City was a very serious felony. Let alone having a gun.

      Criminals with a felony record will often carry common hand tools that you would find in your toolbox, they carry them as a weapon. Motorcycle gangs for example often carry large mechanical wrenches. They could always say they needed to fix something on their motorcycle. Or they could simply whip it out and beat you about the head with it.

      There is an actual Brawl on video of this happening at a Las Vegas casino. Where rival biker gangs attacked each other, and pulled out wrenches and began hitting each other with them.
      I’m sure the people who live in Chicago and travel these more dangerous streets, on a regular basis, know exactly what is about to happen when, someone approaches them with a long heavy object in their hands.

      And that’s the point. This video is set in a large Metropolitan City with a historical rising crime problem. I’m sure people in the rural areas of the country think this is just strange and weird.

      But those that are stuck living and working around criminals, they know exactly what is about to happen. When someone is approaching them carrying a large heavy long object in their hands.

      • He has it in his hand during the conflict shown in the video clip. What happened up to that point isn’t shown.

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