The Must-Have Tactical Christmas Gift This Year: Eugene the M16 Plush Pillow

By
Grace Stevens
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32

 

Here are some of the ways the company describes “Eugene the M16: Rifle Pillow Squish Plushie”—which measures 23″ wide and 16” tall—on their Kickstarter page:

Cute. Squishy. Tactical.

Eugene the the M16 is an epic plushie that is super squishable, crazy cute, and terrifically tactical. 

Generously chonky sized, Eugene the M16 is the perfect perky pillow. Whether protection from nightmares or simply a wildly fun conversation topic, Eugene the M16 will turn heads and make fans wonder, “Where did you find that fantastic squish toy?”

Battlemallows™ are the only “kawaii” (cute) plush weaponry on the market. Already fans are asking, “Who’s next in the Battlemallow™ family?” (we have some designs in the works already).

Joy, happiness, and freedom.

The Battlemallows™ family is being launched with the most popular battle rifIe in the United States, the M16. The history of the M16 is rich, having making its debut during the Vietnam War. the AR-I5 itself is eventually derived from the M16.  

Eugene the M16 is instantly THE coolest squish plush at the party.

— Jennifer Sandlin in Eugene the M16 Is a “Cute, Squishy, Tactical Japanese Kawaii Style Assault Rifle”

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32 COMMENTS

    • Gun-related as depicting minors are prohibited in CA, so I wonder how this would go over if Newsom saw it…he already had a spaz over the JR-15 (.22LR reduced size AR for youths).

  3. It took me to some kickstarter page like i need an app to buy it. I wonder if i can just buy the thing somewhere without any hoops. Im unfamiliar with kickstarter

    • Good question. 🍻 In a few months we’ll put Eugene on Amazon, but only after we fulfill all of the Kickstarter pledges to get them delivered before Christmas. It also depends if we have enough inventory left after fulfilling Kickstarter orders.

      (Unless we get canceled on Amazon. Yes, a pillow with a hilariously cute face getting canceled. What a time to be alive! 😜)

  6. The tacticool kids pillow isn’t something I would buy. Personally, I think this kinda dumb but then silly toys is part of what childhood is all about. I’d rather buy Nerf guns. Atleast those have some level of practicality.

    • 🔫 Nerf guns are a part of our arsenal as well, however they don’t necessarily make for good snuggles or home decor on the couch.

      Eugene the M16 however will protect you from all nightmares.

      You’ll also never lose another pillow fight.

  12. I don’t need this. I have a high caliber rifle on my bed every time I’m laying on it. Just ask the wife….. 🤣

    • According to all the Facebook comments we’ve received, you probably wouldn’t even get that far because of everyone trying to cancel our pillow. (I never thought I’d live to see the day when I’d say a sentence like that)

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